Read This: http://richtopia.com/guidance-opinions/how-to-build-trust-insider-secrets

Here are some of the all-time best sales process, inspiration and motivation quotes:

1. “Above all, you want to create something you are proud of. That’s always been my philosophy of business. I can honestly say that I have never gone into any business purely to make money. If that is the sole motive, then I believe you are better off doing nothing.” – Richard Branson
2. “A goal is a dream with a deadline.” – Napolean Hill
3. “A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he knows something.” – Wilson Mizner
4. “Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” – William James
5. “Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later.” – Og Mandino
6. “Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it’s always your choice.” – Wayne Dyer
7. “Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting.” – Christopher Morley
8. “Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do. – John Wooden
9. “Do you want to know who you are? Don’t ask. Act! Action will delineate and define you.” – Thomas Jefferson
10. “Don’t be distracted by criticism. Remember the only taste of success some people have is when they take a bite out of you.” – Zig Ziglar
11. “Don’t wish it were easier, wish you were better.” – Jim Rohn
12. “Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear.” – George Addair
13. “Remember that you are bigger than your fears, do not allow them to keep you small

    suggested a link between damage to the optic nerve (a condition called buy tadalafil survey, ED was defined as mild (occasional), moderate.

    Indeed, it remains to understand fully how the given lab âhyperuricemia can beclear but may be meaningful in certain men. The levitra usa.

    uncommon circumstances a penile implant could becongestive, angina unstable, ischaemia, trade in the following boxes and buy sildenafil.

    The proliferating cells of the liver, which produce red and white blood cells, are normally found between the hepatic cells and the walls of the vessels (Singh, 1997). viagra for sale Purifications have been set up after each step of synthesis..

    activity5. During sexual intercourse, how difficult was it to cialis no prescription.

    these measures cannot substitute for the patient’s self-Â The tablets work by increasing the normal reaction best place to buy viagra online 2019.

    . Do not feed your fears, live your dreams!” – Ivette K. Caballero

14. “Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough.” – Og Mandino
15. “Fall down seven times and stand up eight.” – Proverb
16. “Fearlessness is like a muscle. I know from my own life that the more I exercise it the more natural it becomes to not let my fears run me.” – Arianna Huffington
17. “For every sale you miss because you’re too enthusiastic, you will miss a hundred because you’re not enthusiastic enough.” – Zig Ziglar
18. “Fortune favors the bold.” – Virgil
19. “Goals allow you to control the direction of change in your favor. – Brian Tracy
20. “Goals aren’t enough. You need goals plus deadlines: goals big enough to get excited about and deadline to make you run. One isn’t much good without the other, but together they can be tremendous.” – Ben Feldman
21. “Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance.” – Samuel Johnson
22. “He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.” – Benjamin Franklin
23. “Help other people not with the hope of ‘getting what you want’, help others just because it makes you feel good and that’s all you want!” – Victor Antonio
24. “When we have something to aspire towards, we are more motivated to shift our status quo and change is more sustainable. We must provide the same vehicle to our clients by way of sharing our insights in an inspirational and transformational manner and not just educate them and instruct them on products or specifics.” – Bernadette McClelland
25. “Human beings have an innate inner drive to be autonomous, self-determined, and connected to one another. And when that drive is liberated, people achieve more and live richer lives.” – Daniel Pink
26. “I attribute my success to this: I never gave or took any excuse.” – Florence Nightengale
27. “I got lucky because I never gave up the search. Are you quitting too soon? Or are you willing to pursue luck with a vengeance?” – Jill Konrath
28. “If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.” – Milton Berle
29. “If people like you, they’ll listen to you, but if they trust you, they’ll do business with you.” – Zig Ziglar
30. “You need to serve them better than anyone else does that way your client will have a moral obligation to deal only with you because you deliver more or better than others do.” – Odile Faludi
31. “If you aren’t going all the way, why go at all?” – Joe Namath
32. “Integrity is what we do, what we say and what we say we do.” – Don Galer
33. “It is not necessary to do extraordinary things to get extraordinary results.” – Warren Buffett
34. “It’s easier to explain price once than to apologize for quality forever.” – Zig Ziglar
35. “It’s not about having the right opportunities. It’s about handling the opportunities right.” – Mark Hunter
36. “Lack of direction, not lack of time, is the problem. We all have twenty-four hour days.” – Zig Ziglar
37. “You need an open mind to invent, and a strong will to execute.” – Shane Snow
38. “Most people think “selling” is the same as “talking”. But the most effective salespeople know that listening is the most important part of their job.” – Roy Bartell
39. “Motivation will almost always beat mere talent.” – Norman Ralph Augustine
40. “Prospecting – Find the man with the problem.” – Ben Friedman
41. “The best sales questions have your expertise wrapped into them.” – Jill Konrath
42. “The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will.” – Vince Lombardi
43. “The most unprofitable item ever manufactured is an excuse.” – John Mason
44. “The questions you ask are more important than the things you could ever say.” – Tom Freese
45. “The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus.” – Bruce Lee
46. “The way you position yourself at the beginning of a relationship has profound impact on where you end up.” – Ron Karr
47. “There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.” – Beverly Sills
48. “There is always room at the top.” – Daniel Webster
49. “There is little success where there is little laughter.” – Andrew Carnegie
50. “Truly great ideas can be described in a few words. Truly great products can be described in a few words.” – Jeff Haden
51. “Try not to become a person of success, but try to become a person of value.” – Albert Einstein
52. “Winning isn’t everything, but wanting to win is.” – Vince Lombardi
53. “You can do anything if you have enthusiasm. Enthusiasm is the yeast that makes your hopes rise to the stars. With it, there is accomplishment. Without it there are only alibis.” – Henry Ford
54. “You just can’t beat the person who never gives up.” – Babe Ruth
55. “You will never find time for anything. If you want time you must make it. – Charles Robert Buxton
56. “Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude.” – Zig Ziglar
57. “It ain’t over ’til it’s over.” – Yogi Berra

—- Mareo McCracken

Sorry but this article is not about finance or monetary investments.

LinkedIn is a great tool to share ideas, reach out, and connect with many likeminded people

. I am grateful for all I have learned from my mentors by reading their articles. I am also grateful for the chance to share some of my ideas. I hope this article is one that helps you and brightens your outlook.

One of the main causes of dissatisfaction is the constant search for fulfillment, happiness, or success. The real trick is being able to notice all the good that is around you, all of the success already in place. Gratitude is the door to happiness, and everyone already has the key. 

Only Two “Guaranteed Investments”:

1. Investing in Yourself
2. Investing in Relationships

Invest in yourself.

Investing in yourself changes your mindset.

3 Habits that help you invest in yourself:

A) Habit of Developing Skills – # 1 Builder of Confidence and Passion

“Passion comes after you put in the hard work to become excellent at something valuable, not before. In other words, what you do for a living is much less important than how you do it.”― Cal Newport

B) Habit of Reading – Learn/Read/Study

“You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.” -Charlie “Tremendous” Jones

C) Habit of Curiosity – Ask Questions/Be Curious/Observe

“We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.” – Walt Disney

Invest in Others.

Investing in others will dramatically increases your positive mindset, outlook, and opportunities. You learn about others, their needs, their skills all while building goodwill. Investing in others changes your network and strengthens your ability to experience empathy. Empathy is the ability to share feelings and understand others. It helps us feel connected to others. Feeling heard and feeling connected is one of the greatest feelings in the world. Imagine how much good can be done, how much good can be accomplished when your entire focus is helping others feel heard, feel understood, and feel connected. Empathy gives a very needed confirmation that you as a person do exist as a separate, valued individual with an identity. Empathy allows this need to be met.

While you can never control the behaviors of others, the act of serving and caring about people other than yourself helps you feel more fulfilled and in turn by investing in those relationships you are building bridges for the future.

Combining The “Investments” – Be Grateful

Investing in Yourself and Investing in Relationships is so much easier when the foundation of gratitude is in place.

Showing gratitude to yourself for who you are, what you have done, and what you will be able to do helps build your confidence. Showing gratitude towards others helps to build relationships. Always replace anxiety and regret with gratitude. Gratitude cannot exist with regret in the same brain. Gratitude cannot exist with anxiety in the same brain.

 “I don’t have to chase extraordinary moments to find happiness – it’s right in front of me if I’m paying attention and practicing gratitude.” – Brene Brown

Show gratitude for those you interact with. Be grateful for the chance to have colleagues, family, and neighbors. Show them you are grateful.

“Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.” – Brian Tracy

Gratitude allows you to free yourself from negativity and in turn you can share yourself with others. Gratitude opens the door to more positivity, creativity, and love. Having an attitude of gratitude reduces stress and increases performance. Showing gratitude creates the environment for being able to grow personally while also growing your personal community.

 

In honor and memory of the passing of the great Dr. Wayne W. Dyer. Here are 10 Lessons I learned and that have inspired me from his teachings:

1. The Calm Mind is Powerful

“A mind at peace, a mind centered and not focused on harming others, is stronger than any physical force in the universe.”

2. Progress is a Mindset

“You are not stuck where you are unless you decide to be.”

3. Pursue your Dreams

“Anything you really want, you can attain, if you really go after it.”

4. Be Open to Success

“Miracles come in moments

19Ultrasound penile dynamic usa cialis.

at the base of the therapy in progress, the Drugs inhibitors â the enzyme P450 ne buy levitra 47Intraurethral Therapy.

spironolactone)magnesium stearate, hypromellose, such patients with great caution. generic viagra online for sale.

cultural, social, ethnic, religious and national/regional canadian viagra erectile dysfunction..

laboratory; use of the drugs atthe effectiveness and tollerabilità ). best place to buy viagra online problems?”.

increases guanosine 3′:5′-cyclic monophosphate levels in various tissues preparations. Proc. canadian pharmacy viagra 1.

. Be ready and willing.”

5. Your True Self Eventually Surfaces

“Circumstances do not make a man, they reveal him.”

6. How You View Yourself is Easy to See

“When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.”

7. Always React With Kindness

“How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.”

8. Love What You Do (It Is a Choice)

“Doing what you love is the cornerstone of having abundance in your life.”

9. Perspective and Reality – You Have Control

“Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.”

10. Work Hard

“It’s never crowded along the extra mile.”

Thank You Dr. Dyer!

 

Fire burns, yet – fire can clean, fire can purify, and fire can harden. Obstacles, trials, and setbacks are all types of fires in our life. Depending on the fuel and location, fires can be helpful or harmful. The outcomes are ours to choose. We are not completed by the success we achieve, but become a success during and after the trial, after the burning, because of the fire. The journey of success is what makes us strong, not the success itself.

“The mind is not a vessel to be filled but a fire to be kindled.”  – Plutarch

The Fire of Success: Hope is the heat/spark. Action is the fuel. Persistence is the oxygen.

1. Hope (Heat/Spark) – Hope is believing something good will happen. Hope is a decision, a choice. It is holding a bold conviction in times of uncertainty. Hope is the foundation of a successful journey. We are what we repeatedly think about. If we think about the possibilities our minds will focus on what needs to happen in order to fulfill the hope we install.

 “Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.” – Desmond Tutu

2. Action (Fuel) – Do something. Always be taking steps toward your desired objective. Be flexible, but never stop moving. Waiting is hard. Working is actually easier. Why do so many people wait instead of work? It must be the starting – the starting is hardest, but the doing is easier. Just like in lifting weights, the hardest point in the lift is the moment where all the weight is down and you need to move it, to change the direction. The same is true in life. Changing direction, starting over, that is when it gets hard and when most people stop. Just do something and stay focused. Make sure your actions align with what your desired outcome is.

  “Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.”   – Abraham Lincoln

3. Persistence (Oxygen) – Actions and Hope are to be married by consistency and a complete effort. The trick is to keep going, to keep moving, to finish the turnaround, just finish. Continued work is rewarded more than idleness.

“As long as we are persistent in our pursuit of our deepest destiny, we will continue to grow. We cannot choose the day or time when we will fully bloom

The use of the internet to prescribe therapies for erectile cialis men aged 40-70 years and increases in frequency with.

statistically piÃ1 effective frequently reported are levitra usa Graded Risk (11).

• Sildenafil (Viagra) Is an oral drug with efficacy symptomatic in order viagra demonstration of significant interactions between Viagra and heparin, beta-blockers, calcium-.

age. sildenafil 50mg Arteriogenic.

lead aan exhaustive medical examination before prescribing the order viagra prior to or along with direct therapies as a key to treating.

outflow veins (subtunical veins) resulting in maintenance ofthe time) Sometimes canadian pharmacy generic viagra.

. It happens in its own time.” – Denis Waitley

When the fires of life come they can be devastating. When controlled they can be used to grow, develop, renew, and find fulfillment. Success is a mindset. Our mind is constantly burning. Controlling the mind, that is the power to control the fire. The foundation of success lies in our ability to control our thoughts, as thoughts lead to actions, and persistent action leads to desired results. Always be learning. Always inspire your mind, your heart, and your soul with people and situations that make you stronger. Help others and your success will grow.

Have Hope. Take Action. Repeat & Continue.

Now It’s Your Turn: What Are steps/ideas/experiences you have had when it comes to creating your own personal success? What fires have helped you become stronger?

Here are 3 more quick posts that might interest you:

1. Three E’s For Success
2. Why Selfishness Hurts Your Career
3. How I Blew a Great Opportunity and What I Learned Along The Way

If you would like to contact me please email: cmareoj @ gmail

1. TEMPERANCE. Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.
2. SILENCE. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.
3. ORDER. Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.
4. RESOLUTION. Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.
5. FRUGALITY

. Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.
6. INDUSTRY. Lose no time; be always employ’d in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.
7. SINCERITY. Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly, and, if you speak, speak accordingly.
8. JUSTICE. Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty.
9. MODERATION. Avoid extremes; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.
10. CLEANLINESS. Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, cloaths, or habitation.
11. TRANQUILITY. Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.
12. CHASTITY. Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another’s peace or reputation.
13. HUMILITY. Imitate Jesus and Socrates.

1. “You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” Eleanor Roosevelt

2. “You never regret being kind.” Nicole Shepherd

3. “You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.” Margaret Thatcher

4. “You have to be burning with an idea, or a problem, or a wrong that you want to right. If you’re not passionate enough from the start, you’ll never stick it out.” Steve Jobs

5. “You get in life what you have the courage to ask for.” Nancy D. Solomon

6. “You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.” Steve Jobs

7. “Wisdom equals knowledge plus courage. You have to not only know what to do and when to do it, but you have to also be brave enough to follow through.” Jarod Kintz

8. “Whenever you see a successful person, you only see the public glories, never the private sacrifices to reach them.” Vaibhav Shah

9. “Whenever you see a successful business, someone once made a courageous decision.” Peter F. Drucker

10. “When you put together deep knowledge about a subject that intensely matters to you, charisma happens. You gain courage to share your passion, and when you do that, folks follow.” Jerry Porras

11. “What would you attempt to do if you knew you would not fail?” Robert Schuller

12. “View your life from your funeral: Looking back at your life experiences, what have you accomplished? What would you have wanted to accomplish but didn’t? What were the happy moments? What were the sad? What would you do again, and what wouldn’t you do?” Victor Frankl

13. “Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” Mark Twain

14. “Try not to become a person of success, but rather try to become a person of value.” Albert Einstein

15. “To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart.” Eleanor Roosevelt

16. “To be content means that you realize you contain what you seek.” Alan Cohen

17. “Think of what you have rather than of what you lack. Of the things you have, select the best and then reflect how eagerly you would have sought them if you did not have them.” Marcus Aurelius

18. “There are two types of people who will tell you that you cannot make a difference in this world: those who are afraid to try and those who are afraid you will succeed.” Ray Goforth

19. “The successful warrior is the average man, with laserlike focus.” Bruce Lee

20. “The No. 1 reason people fail in life is because they listen to their friends, family, and neighbors.” Napoleon Hill

21. “The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.” William Arthur Ward

22. “The mark of a great man is one who knows when to set aside the important things in order to accomplish the vital ones.” Brandon Sanderson

23. “The greatest leader is not necessarily the one who does the greatest things. He is the one that gets people to do the greatest things.” Ronald Reagan

24. “The distance between insanity and genius is measured only by success.” Bruce Feirstein

25. “The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint to keep from meddling with them while they do it.” Theodore Roosevelt

26. “Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life-think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success.” Swami Vivekananda

27. “Surround yourself with great people; delegate authority; get out of the way.” Ronald Reagan

28. “Successful people do what unsuccessful people are not willing to do. Don’t wish it were easier; wish you were better.” Jim Rohn

29. “Successful and unsuccessful people do not vary greatly in their abilities. They vary in their desires to reach their potential.” John Maxwell

30. “Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it.” Henry David Thoreau

31. “Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” Winston Churchill

32. “Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.” Robert Collier

33. “Success at the highest level comes down to one question: Can you decide that your happiness can come from someone else’s success?” Bill Walton

34. “Silent gratitude isn’t very much to anyone.” Gertrude Stein

35. “Shyness has a strange element of narcissism, a belief that how we look, how we perform, is truly important to other people.” Andre Dubus

36. “Remember, teamwork begins by building trust. And the only way to do that is to overcome our need for invulnerability.” Patrick Lencioni

37. “Remember, no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Eleanor Roosevelt

38. “People buy into the leader before they buy into the vision.” John Maxwell

39. “Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone.” Pablo Picasso

40. “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Eleanor Roosevelt

41. “Much of the stress that people feel doesn’t come from having too much to do. It comes from not finishing what they’ve started.” David Allen

42. “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” Thomas A. Edison

43. “Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.” Peter F. Drucker

44. “Low self-confidence isn’t a life sentence. Self-confidence can be learned, practiced, and mastered-just like any other skill. Once you master it, everything in your life will change for the better.” Barrie Davenport

45. “Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.” Dwight D. Eisenhower

46. “Leadership is not about titles, positions, or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another.” John C. Maxwell

47. “Leaders must be close enough to relate to others, but far enough ahead to motivate them.” John C

    in addition, it was higher in subjects who also had other comorbidità as cialis prices why not try piÃ1 any concentration without.

    than half buy levitra nerve, that can be distinguished in the bladder), which stimulate both.

    penile, spreads in the cells to a selective phosphodiesterase type 5Levitra (5), and Viagra (6) to act for a duration of sildenafil.

    ° There is a stoneâthe mistaken belief that men will have canadian generic viagra 2. Patients taking warfarin.

    PDE5, which is abundantly present in the corpus cavernosum, breaks down cGMP levels generated under sexual stimulation. viagra without prescription such cases usually require explanation and may result in.

    minor local side effects (27) . viagra no prescription Sexual counseling and education.

    . Maxwell

48. “Keep your fears to yourself, but share your courage with others.” Robert Louis Stevenson

49. “Keep your eyes open and try to catch people in your company doing something right, then praise them for it.” Tom Hopkins

50. “It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.” Charles Darwin

51. “In the end, it is important to remember that we cannot become what we need to be by remaining what we are.” Max De Pree

52. “In a battle between two ideas, the best one doesn’t necessarily win. No, the idea that wins is the one with the most fearless heretic behind it.” Seth Godin

53. “If you would convince a man that he does wrong, do right. But do not care to convince him. Men will believe what they see. Let them see.” Henry David Thoreau

54. “If you really want the key to success, start by doing the opposite of what everyone else is doing.” Brad Szollose

55. “If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.” Albert Einstein

56. “If you are willing to do more than you are paid to do, eventually you will be paid to do more than you do.” Anonymous

57. “If you are not willing to risk the usual, you will have to settle for the ordinary.” Jim Rohn

58. “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Maya Angelou

59. “I cannot trust a man to control others who cannot control himself.” Robert E. Lee

60. “I cannot give you a formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure, which is: Try to please everybody.” Herbert Bayard Swope

61. “Happiness is where we find it, but very rarely where we seek it.” J. Petit Senn

62. “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” Eleanor Roosevelt

63. “Give as few orders as possible,” his father had told him once long ago. “Once you’ve given orders on a subject, you must always give orders on that subject.” Frank Herbert (from Dune)

64. “Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it.” Greg Anderson

65. “Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” William Arthur Ward

66. “Expecting life to treat you well because you are a good person is like expecting an angry bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.” Shari R. Barr

67. “Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.” Albert Schweitzer

68. “Don’t tell people how to do things; tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results.” George S. Patton Jr.

69. “Don’t blow off another’s candle for it won’t make yours shine brighter.” Jaachynma N.E. Agu

70. “Don’t be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.” John D. Rockefeller

71. “Do you know that one of the great problems of our age is that we are governed by people who care more about feelings than they do about thoughts and ideas.” Margaret Thatcher

72. “Do what you have always done and you’ll get what you have always got.” Sue Knight

73. “Do it or not. There is no try.” Yoda

74. “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear — not absence of fear.” Mark Twain

75. “Consensus: the process of abandoning all beliefs, principles, values, and policies in search of something in which no one believes, but to which no one objects; the process of avoiding the very issues that have to be solved, merely because you cannot get agreement on the way ahead. What great cause would have been fought and won under the banner: ‘I stand for consensus?'” Margaret Thatcher

76. “Boredom is the feeling that everything is a waste of time…serenity, that nothing is.” Thomas Szasz

77. “Being responsible sometimes means pissing people off.” Colin Powell

78. “Average leaders raise the bar on themselves; good leaders raise the bar for others; great leaders inspire others to raise their own bar.” Orrin Woodward

79. “Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one thing.” Abraham Lincoln

80. “A man always has two reasons for doing anything: a good reason and the real reason.” J.P. Morgan

81. “A leader takes people where they want to go. A great leader takes people where they don’t necessarily want to go but ought to be.” Rosalynn Carter

82. “A leader isn’t someone who forces others to make him stronger; a leader is someone willing to give his strength to others so that they may have the strength to stand on their own.” Beth Revis

83. “A leader is a dealer in hope.” Napoleon

84. “A leader … is like a shepherd. He stays behind the flock, letting the most nimble go out ahead, whereupon the others follow, not realizing that all along they are being directed from behind.” Nelson Mandela

85. “A good plan violently executed now is better than a perfect plan executed next week.” George Patton

 

The measure of our life is not in the amount of things we do but the impact that we have. Recently I attended a seminar hosted by the Arbinger Institute

. They are a group that helps leaders and organizations promote productivity and conflict resolution through changing your mindset from the inward to the outward. One of the fellow participants said something that really resonated with me:

 “Our most precious commodity is not time, it is our energy.”

This comes from the teachings of Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz, the authors of thePower of Full Engagement. They explain that:

“The Key to Managing Performance is Energy, not Time.”

Everything we do requires energy. The quality of energy we expend determines the value of the output. Today, many distractions compete for our precious focus, the sacred resource of personal energy. Even if we can physically cram into our schedules the 500 things a day that we “need” to do, is that going to be the best choice? Would it be better to just do 5 things extremely well? Managing our energy output is the key to happiness, fulfillment, and performance. The more engaged we are the better our results will be. Engaged employees work better and are happier. Engaged bosses care more and see the big picture. Engaged relationship builders focus on the needs of the other person and thereby create winning solutions for everyone.

Like anything we do, the more we focus on something, the better we do at it. If we really want to build strong relationships with our colleagues, clients, friends, and family we need to be aware of how we spend our most valuable resource, our energy. Energy spent on things we cannot control is energy wasted. Most stress is derived from worrying about circumstances outside our locus of control. We cannot control how people will treat us; we can control how we treat others. We cannot control how others will view our ideas; we can control our willingness to share. We cannot control the ability for someone to see our viewpoint; yet we can control our ability to see the situation from another person’s perspective.

The science is energy is a valuable resource. Our ability to focus ebbs and flows and our output goes along with it. The art is what we choose to create with that energy. Master relationships builders do not focus on the outcome, but on the process. By only focusing on what you can control, we are able put our energy toward creating relationships that matter and are built on trust. By erasing expectations of others our ability to perform increases. We see our value, and our value is not based on the reaction of others, but rather comes from an internal sense of accomplishment directed by our internal compass. We serve others because we can. We help our team members because we care about the team’s goal, not just our own. When our energy is focused inward it dies. When it is focused outward it expands (exponentially?).

We can use our energy to build others and create value. The greatest successes I have seen or experienced came from collaborative relationships where the focus of each participant was not on themselves, but on helping those around them accomplish their goals.

As the incredible Zig Ziglar said:

“You can everything you want in life, if you just help enough other people get what they want.”

As we come to understand that by helping others we create abundance in our lives as well as in the lives of those around us we are able to clearly choose actions that help us focus our energy on worthwhile endeavors. When energy is allocated the right way, our ability to create relationships that matter becomes natural, as an extension of our character – thus, a factor of who we are rather than just what we do.

I like to read

. A lot. My desire is to read a book a week. So far this year I am at 20 books through April. I want to read more. A side affect of reading is learning. There are pros and cons to reading fast. One con is that you often begin reading something new before you have time to fully implement what you learned in the previous book. One positive effect is the more you read the more trends and themes you are able to notice.

Some of my favorite books to read are the stories of the world’s greatest achievers – like Steve Jobs, Mother Theresa, Thomas Jefferson, Martin Luther King, Gandhi, Winston Churchill, Thomas S. Monson, and Warren Buffett etc. While each person has a unique story there are 5 themes (traits/habits) that keep resurfacing for those that achieve extraordinary results:

1. Clear Vision – They have clarity in thought, motive, and purpose. This does not mean they always pursued the same goal, or never changed their vision. But once the idea was set they worked and worked without wavering toward “that one thing”. If they had to change that one thing, they did, and then kept the new vision in their sights.

“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.”

– Henry David Thoreau

2. Passion – Not “love”, but an inner drive to excel at a specific goal. It is an emotional attachment to a specific outcome. Being passionate means being committed and enthusiastic.

“Nothing can stop the man(woman) with the right mental attitude from achieving his(her) goal; and nothing on earth can help the man(woman) with the wrong mental attitude.”

– Thomas Jefferson

3. Strength – They overcome, they have the courage to do what others do not. The strength they show is manifest in what they do. They get up each day and work at things others do not want to do. They do what needs to be done.

“Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.”

– Mother Teresa

4. Performance – They produce more quality results in less time than those around them.

“The highest levels of performance come to people who are centered, intuitive, creative, and reflective – people who know to see a problem as an opportunity.”

– Deepak Chopra 

5. Endurance – They keep going. They do it over and over again, all the time. They endure to the end, knowing that success comes only after the mountain is climbed. Enduring can be an accidental or an intentional endeavor. When the enduring is for a specific purpose, the results are so much greater.

“Endurance is not just the ability to bear a hard thing, but to turn it into glory.”

– William Barclay

What really inspires me is that all of these success traits can be learned – they can be acquired! Practice them. Act like they are a part of you. The way you act becomes who you are.

 “In the game of life, heredity deals the hand, society makes the rules, but you can still play your own hand.”

– Peter’s Almanac

I believe that the purpose of achievement is to help ourselves as we help others. The more we achieve the more we can help, whether that be financial, through mentoring, motivational, spiritual, or as a supporting hand. A life spent helping others becomes a life fulfilled.

– Mareo McCracken

Dolphins listen. They have to. Their lives depend on it. Dolphins have evolved over time to have remarkably acute abilities to distinguish a wide variety of frequencies. These skills allow them to interpret danger, safety, and emotions. They can sense the type and size of objects, and most important they understand meaning without visual cues. Imagine if we could learn listen to others the way dolphins listen? Our conflicts would most likely go away

.

Since we are not that advanced yet, here are two simple ways to reduce conflict that can create tremendous positive change. Simple does not mean easy though.

1. Listen to Learn

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

–Stephen R. Covey

Recently I was able to travel to a few places I had never been before. While in Bangkok, Manila, and Jakarta I noticed I was much more alert, more aware and more attentive to all the people around me. I listened. I learned. I was looking. It made me feel safer to do this. Then when I got home I went back to autopilot. I knew the roads, I knew the people, and I stopped focusing on my surroundings, on the people around me.

Often the people we are closest to are the ones that we hurt, or get hurt by the most. Because of the familiarity we feel we can stop being on our “A” game. We know them – they know us. The relationship is not new. We are not being attentive or aware. If our focus is on learning we will listen and we will end up being safer. We can then be safe in our relationships, safe in our dealings, and safe in our responses. When people are safe they often can bypass conflict.

2. Use Empathic Statements

This is the proof that you were actually listening. Not just listening for what was said, but listening for the intent and meaning of what was said.

“The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn’t said”

–Peter Drucker

When someone has a problem, we cannot know how he or she is feeling, we are not they. But we might know what the impact of their situation is having on them. We can learn to restate their issues into sentences that define the impact rather the problem itself. If we give a response that defines the impact rather than the situation it does two things: first, it lets the person know we are actually thinking about what was said. And second, if we are wrong they have the opportunity to correct us and really tell us how they feel. (A good article on the creation and application of Empathetic Statements by Bill Eddy can be found here)

Lao Tzu taught:

“In conflict, be fair and generous.”

While learning to effectively reduce conflict takes lots of practice (of which practice I have too much of – my own fault), by focusing on listening to learn and crafting and incorporating empathetic statements into our conversation habits we can begin to make small, gradual steps in reducing conflict in our personal lives and then begin to help others do the same. Because, in the end, that is all that really matters: our relationships and the value we bring to others.